French fries, mixed drinks, and weirdness

I remember my mother always saying, "They all have the same flavor," whether it be lite ranch or not, I could ALWAYS taste the difference.

Growing up it took me a while to get used to new foods and even then there are a few vegetables and things I refuse to eat.

Texture is a real thing in foods for me. 

My parents had an apple tree at our old house and it was my job to pick up the rotten apples off of the grass. There was many times that they were so rotten they would turn into mush and I can distinctly remember getting apple "gook" on my fingers and freaking out.

I got pretty creative picking up the rotten apples. My dad would always say "just pick them up real fast with your hands and you'll be ok. The more you have your little tricks, the longer it will take!"

I couldn't do fun things until my chores were done. 

One thing I distinctly remember, beyond the feel, is the smell. The sickly sweet rotten smell of wet apple would give me the shivers. When we harvested the apples, my mother would make apple sauce for food storage. It was always fun to help her can things (especially salsa) but when it comes to apple sauce....I cannot stand anything about it.

If one has never made homemade applesauce it is quite a process. You have to cook the apples up so they are soft and mushy. Then you take them out of the boil process and then put it into an archaic torture device and squish the apples through the hole. At one end of the machine the apple seeds, core, stem and skin comes out to be thrown away. The applesauce mush comes out through a sluice. 

The reason why I hate applesauce and cooked apples (hell even apple pie...as my husband says I am weird), is the texture. When making applesauce the smell of rotten, wet, cooked apples becomes aroma-ticized and it permeates the house. My mom tried to make me try the hot applesauce as it came out the machine (It is one of those things...if it is not meant to be eaten hot...I DON'T WANT TO EAT IT HOT!!!!) 

It would make me gag...any type of cooked fruit makes me gag now. The texture is too funky and slimy and sends me back to my apple picking days and I have horrible memories. 

Another weirdness with me is rating my favorite french fry places. It was one of the funnest dates I would ever do. We would go to five or six of the best fast food joints in town and order small orders of fries. Then we would rate them on how good they were and whether we wanted to eat more. It was super simplistic but holy OMG it was so much fun and it was fun to rate things. You got to know people really well and talk about random crap while doing it.

*In case you were wondering, my favorite french fries are from Arctic Circle. I like how they hold up to dipping and they are never super salty.

*My favorite sit down restaurant fries are those from the Grecian Key downtown. The steak fries are delicious and I really like bigger fries in general.

---and not to mention fried cheese curds...those are sooo good!

All french fries have to be eaten with ranch (and not all ranch is the same). It is a toss up between two different brands. One is the Litehouse Homestyle Ranch, but the other is oddly from Walmart and it is called Wild Coyote Ranch. 

-Best sit down ranch is from Applebees and Buffalo Wild Wings

-Best fast food ranch is from Jimmy Johns (their zesty ranch is to die for and holy cow....SO GOOD)

Mixed drinks

Now the types of mixed drinks I am talking about are the non alcoholic kinds. There has been a craze of mixed non alcoholic soda drinks that has exploded. Places like the Drink Factory or Soda Barn, Soda Craze...basically any name one can think of associated to drinks or soda. The premise is this, a business has a fountain put into their store and buys every popular drink flavoring known to man. These drink flavors can be like Torani, DaVinci, and numerous others. They put a squirt in a soda drink and make their own signature names.

I am of the small portion of people in the world who really likes Diet Mountain Dew. I discovered a really good combination of Diet Dew with Green Apple and I am addicted. I like the sour flavor and hell the bubbles are delicious.

Everyone says that fountain drinks from gas stations are all created equal...I submit that they are not! My favorite gas station fountain is from Maverick...and my favorite soda shop is the Drink Factory in Blackfoot, but the Soda Barn in Pocatello is a really close second.

I don't know why I felt like writing this but I thought it would be fun to let people glimpse at my weirdness. 

The hidden door: A tale of a young knight

*A little sidebar. My son is using his imagination right now and creating his own worlds. I am in love with how adventurous he has become and how he uses his imagination. My mother told me for years that I was the same way. I would create stories out of inanimate objects. Here is a story I created of his adventures.

The hot day did nothing to deter the little knight from his quest. He noticed the table in the corner was broken and needed his architectural skills. He used his ever-growing bag of tools to fix the table and started putting them away in the chest. 

This was then, when he noticed the white door. It was innocuous and most people when traveling across the realm, their eyes would slide over the wall and the little knight believed no one else could see it but him. He snuck by the queen and grabbed the sparkly keys on the table and ran back to the door. None of the keys seemed to work. 

The little knight got frustrated. Each time he tried a new key, ten new keys popped up in its place. Finally, the little knight sat down getting discouraged. As he stared at the lock, he noticed a ridiculously small design near the lock. It looked like a fingerprint, but it was the same size as his fingers. He smiled and laughed heartily. He popped up off the floor and tried one of the Queen's keys again. This time he tucked the finger of his other hand under the lock on top of the design. As he did so a resultant click of the white door unlocking meant he had finally got it open!

He pushed the door open to find the gateway to another world. As he walked through the door, he noticed everything was like one of his books! He walked out into the world behind the door. When he shut the door behind them, he noticed HIS door had melted into the bark of a tree. He could see the little insignia of his fingerprint. The little knight knew this was his adventure.

He walked into town when he found the people were all scared! They were being destroyed by two vicious creatures. A dragon and a vicious tiger had been picking off villagers and destroying the buildings. The little knight looked around and asked if he could be of service. Even though he was little, he was pure of heart and knew he could help the village. 

He was pointed in the direction of the mountains nearby. The dangerous creatures made their way into town from that direction. The little knight made sure he had his sword and shield and ran off in the direction of the mountain. He was enveloped by the rancid smell of animals as he got closer. The ground started shaking underneath his feet. Even though he had felt an earthquake, the ground shaking was not an earthquake. It was more like the shaking of when something big falls. The little knight moved closer and found an interesting sight. A brown dragon with spikes was on his back and was fast asleep. That was not the weirdest thing. On his belly, which was radiating warmth, was the head of a completely black tiger. They were both asleep and seemed to enjoy each other's company. The little knight steeled his courage and moved closer.

As he got close enough to smell. The tiger and dragon opened their eyes and looked at him with curiosity. They had never smelled or ever seen such a small knight. Even though the dragon loved eating humans, he did not think he could eat such a little knight. The tiger started purring. He got up and moved closer to the little knight. The knight froze waiting to see if he was in danger. He did not feel like he was in danger but could not be sure. The tiger moved until the knight could feel his warm breath on his face. He stared at the green eyes of the tiger, not showing he was afraid. The tiger lolled his tongue out and licked the small knight from his chin to his hair. The little knight giggled.

The little knight knew he could not hurt these guys. Yet he knew he was tasked with taking care of the village. He sat down and thought about it until his brain was sore. He had an idea that might work well for everyone. As he explained his idea the dragon and tiger looked at each other with a grin. When night fell, the little knight beckoned to the dragon and tiger to follow him. 

He made his way on the outskirts of town keeping to the line of the trees. With each move they got closer to the secret door. Finally, the little knight reached the door and placed his fingers on the little mark. A door opened inwards, as he was beckoning to the dragon and tiger, he heard a rallying cry from the villagers. They had heard them moving around the trees and knew something was afoot. They did not want to see the dragon and tiger leave. The villagers ran as fast as their feel could carry them. The little knight knew he had to act. He pushed the tiger through the door. The dragon got stuck on his spikes and his toes got stuck. He roared trying to get loose. Finally, he slipped through the door. The little knight shut the door behind him as he yelled, "Sorry!" He was back in his own little world.

He was startled by something rubbing up against his leg. The little knight saw a full black kitten with green eyes gazing up at him. Climbing up his leg he also saw a little brown bearded dragon. He giggled and clapped his hands, glad his little creatures made it! He made his way home to the queen with his new pets. 

They named the bearded dragon Frank, or Frankie to the little knight. The cat, although feisty, was named Ichabod after the Queen's favorite character. They lived happily ever after...until the next adventure. 

What the owl? Birds, Memorial Day, and future questions

Memorial Day weekend, besides being my wedding anniversary, it is one of the traditional weekends in my family. For years we would gather at my Aunt Helen's house and put together the flower arrangements for family members that have passed on. One doesn't appreciate it as much as a child, but as one gets older one can feel the reasoning behind it.

The virus has created a new issue for grave decorating. My aunts are both immune compromised and could not come out with us. It was up to my mother and father to take the reins. They decided to do fresh flower arrangements and small flags to give honor to those who had passed away. When we started on our trek, I had no idea it was going to be one of the coolest days.

The only grave of a person I remember was my Grandma Gardner and Grandpa Sid. Sid passed away when I was 5 and I only really remember him calling me princess and having lemon drops from his pockets. I also remember him taking naps. All I could see was his boots hanging off the edge of the bed, he was quite tall. My grandma passed the year before I graduated in high school. She taught me so many things, including how to properly shuffle cards and to never cheat. She liked to shoot magpies in the garden and talked to the plants in every windowsill. I think I get a lot of my energy from her side of the family.

After dropping her flowers off and introducing my little man to her and telling stories about her, we made our way to the Moreland cemetery. I remember this cemetery a lot as a kid because of a water pump and getting drenched in the process. We placed the flowers on the site. I heard rustling above me...and thought it was a squirrel. We continued to chat for a bit and I could hear the rustling again, except it was a hell of a lot bigger than I thought it would be. I looked up to see what it was, a huge owl! I have never seen an owl outside in the wild, only in a zoo. I tried to get a photo of it, but it flew to a nearby pine tree. It was squeaking with its mate! This was the coolest thing I have ever seen in my life.

I have always felt drawn to animals and it seems carrion birds are drawn to me. Falcons and hawks are some birds that I always see driving around. They are in my life and tend to show up when I need them. I know calling it my spirit animal is considered cultural appropriation, but the closest I can think of is they are drawn to my energy. Whatever one calls it, falcons and hawks are my favorite energy calling, often seen, and much loved birds.

In my research for future stories, I hope to meet someone who could help me go through the steps to find out if falcons truly are my spirit animal. I want to give honor to ancestors and energies in the proper way. 

A lonely life: a diver's look at life

One of my favorite jobs at the Morning News was hearing stories of people who came in. The one that always stuck with me was the stories of Doug. Here is the article I wrote. 

"

10 Dec 2019

By Emily Thornton reporter@am-news.com

MORNING NEWS - EMILY THORNTON

This compass was in the water for over thirty years. Items like portholes, lamp covers, clocks, and bottles, are just a few of the items in Hoksbergen’s collection.

BLACKFOOT– When one looks at documentaries about the ocean or watching movies about deep sea diving, one can imagine what it might be like. Not for Doug Hoksbergen, his dream of being a deep sea diver was born when he first saw “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.” For years the image of the diver walking away from the submarine and surviving on a single breathing implement, was something that drove him to chase that dream. “My grandfather said ‘ Don’t let anyone tell you no.’ My brother was supportive too.”

When Doug sat down to interview for the Divers Institute of Technology in Seattle, Washington: he almost didn’t make it to the next round of classes. On the wall was a prop from 20,000 Leagues, which was donated to the school. He had pulled it off the wall and put it over his head, “I just had to, you know?” and the lady doing the interview was a little terse with him about it. However, he made it through training. Six to seven months of training and Doug finally had the moment to get into the water. “I knew this is what I always wanted to do.”

One of the most memorable dives Doug went on was on Eugene Island off the gulf of Mexico. “I was only down about 200 feet and it was three in the morning. Even with my head lamp, you can’t see very far in front of you. I looked around and all I could see was these green dots. I was surrounded by sharks. They don’t mess with you. Honestly all the wildlife you see down there don’t mess with you.”

There are some interesting aspects of diving that most people don’t hear about. As a diver one cannot be bashful.

When getting in or out of the suit, “You have to strip down to your birthday suit and get hosed off. Then hopping into the small areas within five minutes and getting gear on, you learn to not care and not be bashful.”

Doug has done numerous types of diving within the field. Saturation diving seems to be one of the most brutal types of diving. One is placed in a hyperbaric chamber which is saturated in a way to keep the occupants at the proper dry pressurization. They are lowered into the water to reach the right working pressure. They are then in the chamber for 28 days and work for about 10 hours a day. They usually do saturation diving chambers for depths greater than 250 feet. Depending on what the work is needed. “It is like having a high paying jail sentence. You do the work and then are stuck in the small confines after going out. It is grueling but hey 28 days on and 28 days off ain’t bad. One of the top women compression divers would rebuild cars on her ranch when off the rig.”

Some of the gear needed for working on underwater demolitions was different than the average diver’s. One has to be safe when the explosion goes off, as well as keeping the innards intact. Doug worked on demolitions mainly with Chevron and when helping with hurricane restoration. “You’ve seen how big those platforms can get. Now imagine them twisted and hurled a couple miles away. There has to be a way to bring up the rubble and get the oil platforms back to working order.”

When Doug was working on salvaging and wrecks, he would find some very interesting items. One ship he found a perfect working compass (which had been water logged) was sunk within two years of being decommissioned. The compass had been in the water for over thirty years but was saved from most of the ravages from the way it was packed away. Items like portholes, lamp covers, clocks, and bottles, are just a few of the items in his collection he is proud of.

Even though Doug dealt with body recovery during hurricanes and salvaging wrecks: he still remains a positive person. The average diver lasts in the business for around five years. Many times it is due to wear on the body or getting injuries. Doug has had numerous injuries from his salvaging, including numerous scars. He even had his ribs broken by a very playful dolphin. “It takes a certain type of person to remain in the business. I absolutely loved the water. It was some of the most peaceful times, just being in the suit and seeing the wildlife. I got to see things very few people get to see first-hand. It’s a unique feeling.” Doug managed to stay within the business for 20 years and has seen places all over the globe. He moved back to Blackfoot after retiring “for the third or fourth time” and has been enjoying being back home with family and friends. “I will always miss the water. But I do like being back.”

This is only a fraction of the stories he told us, but I am very happy to have met this man. He has gone through a lot of things in his life and has kept a good attitude about changes in his life. 

New adventures of a "now" stay at home mom

I have always had a drive to write. Ever since I was a child I would create stories with salt and pepper shakers, cups, or anything near by. I loved creating worlds which made sense to me. The written word was always something for me and I feel my constant reading helped me as well.

Last year I finally got my chance and received my dream job! I was asked to be a general reporter with the Blackfoot Morning News. This job was so much fun. The editor became a really close friend and the banter between all of us made it one of my favorite jobs.

When the coronavirus hit the area, we lost all of the sales team and one of the amazing friends at the office had to work from home. We did ok for a while. We were doing better than the other insert in town and because of this, the larger company decided to purchase our paper, and get rid of us. It wasn't so much a merger, as it was a hostile takeover. I lost my dream job and I will forever miss it.

A little background about me is I have a Masters in Journalism and have loved every part of it. I have been married for close to eight years and we had a little guy in 2016. I was going to school all through the early years of my little man and have been proud of how far I have come. I am proud my little three year old, and he loves creating his own worlds too! 

Moving through the stages of loss, I am currently at the anger stage. I am sad I am no longer at the job and will miss the customers I got to see every day. I am sad about missing the banter. I am mad because I honestly hate the job hunt. I never liked it after I lost my job as an English teacher. Though through each challenge I am going to rise above and become better than I was before.